Lite humor är aldrig fel.......
"David De Gea's attempt to hand in a transfer request has failed after he dropped it before he could get to Sir Alex Ferguson's office"
"Alex Ferguson has blamed today's defeat on a sickness bug that affected the whole Manchester United squad Apart from David De Gea he didn't catch anything"
Sir Alex Ferguson has opted for a new training regime for under-pressure goalkeeper David de Gea that he believes will really benefit the team in the long run.
He hopes to employ the new tactics against Stoke.
"Alright David, odds are you'll be up against Kenwyne Jones on Tuesday, I want you to act big, assert your dominance-"
"And then boss?"...
"Make sure you're in the referee's eyesight."
"Yes boss?"
"Then you spit in his face and call him a black cunt. Who knows, with any luck we could get you banned till May," replies Sir Alex.
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